How do reach, teach, and lead when the world starts to wobble?
And what can you learn about managing energy from an executive coach whose own career took her to Sr. Dir. Of Marketing of a publicly traded company? Plenty!
In this episode of #ThoughtLeaderConversations, V2's Roger Courville, CSP sits down with Nina Cashman, PCC, career and executive coach at Pave Your Way, LLC. You'll want to listen in, because today's brilliance comes from one of the lead trainers at iPEC coaching, has 26 years of business experience and 18 years of corporate management/leadership experience, even has a certificate in Happiness Studies from Happiness Studies Academy! Nina is currently pursuing a master’s degree in Happiness Studies with Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar and Centenary University and is on track to graduate in May of 2025.
Nina's passion is to build people over products, and as you listen in to this conversation, you will:
Understand how aligning personal energy with professional roles creates sustainable leadership and improved outcomes
Learn why reconnecting with your authentic self is critical for effective decision-making and avoiding burnout
Explore the relationship between emotional energy and productivity, and how addressing limiting beliefs can unlock potential
Discover how the energy leaders project impacts team morale, customer experience, and ultimately, the bottom line
Hear how to manage imposter syndrome by reframing feedback and critique as opportunities for growth
Gain insights into fostering inclusivity and connection in virtual environments through mindful engagement practices
Learn why addressing the whole person—including personal challenges—is vital for effective executive coaching
Find out how to question and clarify what you truly want, identifying the underlying motivations behind your goals
Understand the importance of a contemplative pause during transitions to make intentional career and life decisions, and
Discover the role of core energy coaching in helping leaders achieve clarity, alignment, and better professional outcomes.
Series: #ThoughtLeaderConversations
Sponsor: V2, LLC, expert virtual and hybrid event production, www.VirtualVenues.com
Host: Roger Courville, CSP, https://www.linkedin.com/in/rogerc/
Keywords: #Leadership #CoreEnergyManagement #AuthenticLeadership #LimitingBeliefs #ExecutiveCoaching #IntentionalTransitions
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UNEDITED TRANSCRIPT
[00:00:00] Roger Courville, CSP: How do you reach, teach and lead when the world starts to wobble? And what can you learn about managing energy from an executive coach whose own career took her to senior director of marketing as of a publicly traded company? Well, I think the answer is plenty. Hello and welcome to core energy management for marketing leaders.
My name is Roger Corville and welcome to another episode of thought leader conversations. Sponsored by the crew here at virtual venues, where you can instantly scale your virtual and hybrid event production team with a crew that will help you focus on something other than tech and logistics. We're not here to talk about us and I'm excited to welcome to the virtual stage of someone with a lot of experience training virtually in a whole bunch of stuff, Nina Cashman.
P-C-C-C-P-C-E-L-M-P soon to have her master's in Happiness Studies. But let me give you a little background. Career and executive coach at her own organization. Pave your Way. LLC Lead trainer at ipec Coaching 26 years of business experience, 18 of which was in corporate management and leadership. And, uh, has that certificate in happiness Studies expect, uh, less than a year have the master's in that.
And I love this. This came off our website. A passion to build people over products. Welcome Nina. I'm glad you're here. Tell us a little more about who you are and what you do.
[00:01:16] Nina Cashman, PCC: Thank you so much for having me, Roger. It's so nice to be here with you. Um, so you summarized quite well my background. You've got all those bullet points.
Thank you for that. I appreciate the introduction. The main focus of what I do, and I have been doing since 2014 for about 10 years now is developing. people within the executive space. And I highlight the word people because at the end of the day, no matter what role we have, what title we have, or what bullet is listed under our credentials, we're human beings with beating hearts, brains, um, and, and guts and intuition.
And there's all different aspects to us that, that make up our Our, uh, humanity. And I would say that one of the places where I've really honed in on in the last, uh, I guess almost 11 years, a 10 year solid, but in 2025, it'll be 11 years next November is to really dig into the human, uh, out, out behind the face of, of whatever title someone is holding.
And I find in doing that, uh, the, the success rates. that, that we're able to achieve in partnership and an executive coaching partnership are really phenomenal because the way someone shows up as a leader has everything to do with who they are as a human being. And let's face it sometimes in our careers or in life.
We, uh, disconnect or lose sight of who we are. We don't necessarily, we know we, we adopt the title or we adopt the relationship or allow another person to define who we are. And when we disconnect life can get pretty chaotic. Um, so a big part of leadership development, a big part of, of moving forward successfully in our careers.
It's just really reconnecting confidently with the truth of who we are. And I would say that at the end of the day, that's the bulk of where a lot of my work is. I call myself an executive coach. And really at the end of the day, all great coaches, regardless of the niche are really just life coaches, uh, connecting to something much deeper than, than the initial topic that comes through the door.
[00:03:32] Roger Courville, CSP: I loved the one quote that I found on your website from Plato. We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. So just out of curiosity, when you work with leaders and maybe even particularly marketers, since I know you get some of that in your background.
What are some of those root cause challenges that you see them facing?
[00:03:54] Nina Cashman, PCC: Well, as with anyone, we all have the tendency to place a lot of emphasis on the external world around us. And not only our interpretations on what's happening around us, which we don't always have the full picture, uh, also other people's interpretations of what's going on.
And that runs rampant in the corporate space is adoption of ideas outside of our us. Uh, that cause us to jump on bandwagons that might at times refute our own, um, idea of what is actually true. And um, you know, one of the things that, that is probably the most important to really accept that's foundational to the work I would do with anyone is to really look into where our belief systems are coming from.
And the most important aspect is to really question or challenge any belief that causes you to limit yourself. Those are, those are the things that you really want to catch as a, as a foundation, because oftentimes we're accepting limiting ideas about ourselves or situations or others that cause us to approach situations in an unproductive way.
or cause us to lead ourselves down paths that are not very productive. And again, we're just accepting, uh, ideas outside of ourselves that are not necessarily even the truth. Um, and if you're going to accept any truth, uh, and if you're not going to necessarily know what's true, why not accept something, some idea that creates It's, um, some positivity and productivity in your life or a sense of well being in your life.
And that's something that we as executives in the corporate arena have really lost sight of is the importance of the well being of our people, the well being of executives. Uh, because without, without Those without without those who are running the show feeling well and feeling connected and feeling aligned things can get off course pretty quickly, which is not good for the person.
It's not good for the team. It's not good for the company. It's not good for shareholders. So it's interesting how this connection between bottom line and human well being. is, is, is made so clear in the process, I would say, of, of executive coaching. And back to the Plato quote that you mentioned before, that's really where the light is.
Uh, the light is discovering the scary stuff about what you believe about yourself, the truth. Uh, and also having the courage to do some of the hard work to weed through it all. And, and get to the spaces, uh, where you feel are true, which sometimes means you got to refute the bandwagon, which means you got to say no to the external world and where that bandwagon is going.
And that is not always easy, uh, but it is where the light is, I believe. And it takes courage. The whole process takes courage, which is why I actually have so much respect for any client who works with me.
[00:07:14] Roger Courville, CSP: I've heard it a couple of different companies with, uh,
And I think one of the things that he would say over and over again is, you can manage people or you can manage numbers. And I can't tell you how many times I've seen that philosophy unfold in, uh, implicitly in leadership values and how they did things. Like, so for instance, when we were at Microsoft, albeit this was a long time ago, this is not an indictment of the current version of Microsoft.
but but they would reorg. At least twice a year, and I've, I've known people who got laid off, rehired, laid off, rehired three times, right? Had nothing to do with their performance. It was just pushing, you know, managing numbers and oops, you're in the wrong spot at the wrong time. You're out. Oh, you're valuable.
Come back. What? And, uh, and it took a toll on, on people in a, in a, in a way that at least from my perspective, didn't have to, right? I don't think there has to be a disconnect between. Managing the numbers, which we're all stewards of and remembering that we got real people. Um, so just out of curiosity, core energy management or core energy coaching.
Tell me a little more about that in your practice and what it might mean to. To somebody who's a potential client.
[00:08:41] Nina Cashman, PCC: Yeah. I love in your title, how you put that together at core energy management, because my background is in core energy coaching. And what that aims to do is really get us. to the root.
What's behind one's motivation or one's demotivation? There's, there's energy behind it. And by energy, it's really, you know, to put it in lighter terms, almost an attitude. And an attitude comes from something. An attitude comes from a past experience. So there's a reason why we have certain attitudes and certain energy.
Energy, though, if you think about it, is really just movement momentum of really in the simplest terms. I'm sure if a scientist is watching, they would want to have a little conversation with me about that definition. And yet, at the same time, in the simplest of terms, our energy sort of directs our movement.
And I love that you tied that to management, Roger, because, um, It does impact how we lead and how we manage others and how we influence others back to that Microsoft example that you just brought up, which is such a good one, the way we our decisions make others feel. And the impact that that only focusing on a spreadsheet has on the morale of culture.
And by the way, that culture of people are interfacing with your customers. And so if the morale is down with the people who are interfacing with your customers. What do you think the customer experience is going to be like? And if the customer experience feels as bad as it does for those who are interacting with the customers, what's going to happen to your numbers?
So here we are now full circle in a cycle of energy, in an energy loop that's all created by core energy in our management system. style. So it's more important in, in terms of how things function than I think people are willing to, um, at the face, uh, admit in the beginning. Although I do think a lot of companies are wising up to it now because, uh, you know, the coaching industry is booming.
It's clear that companies recognize. How important and useful it is to allow, uh, their people to, to talk to someone and to have some safe space to, um, think things through and, and even vent in some cases, just, just a safe space to process. What's happening at work, um, is, is, it must be showing, and I do know through my own clientele that it does, uh, show successful outcomes and even ROI, um, because if it didn't, our, our industry wouldn't be booming to the extent that it is.
[00:11:30] Roger Courville, CSP: Yeah, and this is not a perfect answer, but I've always kind of parsed that in, in relational versus transactional kind of go to it strategy, right? First, I'll have to do something transactional on occasion, but, but even in that, right, we all know the difference between the transaction of buying something into the grocery store and, and actually having a moment of connectedness with the person who checks you out, which I would argue is relational, even in the process of doing the transaction.
It makes all the difference, right? I mean, you can go to 10 dentists and they all have the same potential in terms of getting, getting your face fixed, but who do you go back to the one with, you know, it's not just about the transaction, so talk to me, let's, let's, uh, Explore that a bit from the perspective of your own experience as a trainer.
I know you've done a ton of training, both in person and online. What's been your experience, particularly as, as you had to grow into doing something virtual because, uh, either by hook or by crook or by COVID, um, you know, we all ended up in that space in some way, shape, or form besides freaks like me that had been doing it for so long.
What was your journey like? in terms of becoming and excelling as a trainer.
[00:12:49] Nina Cashman, PCC: That is such a cool question that I haven't thought of for a long time. And I also like the fact that it's coming from you because you were also a part of, of that process in terms of transitioning for a time during COVID, as you mentioned from live to virtual, which I'll get to in a minute.
Um, the, the beautiful thing about really any new endeavor that any of us do, you know, and whether it's training or becoming a new leader, becoming a, a, a new vp, uh, becoming a new director, whatever it is, becoming a c-level executive, is that suddenly you're put in a position where. that's new to you. So there's, there's an unknown.
And oftentimes with that fear of unknown comes this concern about critique and judgment, uh, and potential criticism. That's, that's, that's something that creates a lot of self doubt. And if I've seen a common denominator in almost all the people I work with, it's imposter syndrome is a normal thing. So I hope that actually puts everyone at ease.
That's one of the benefits of my job. When you work with several people, you begin to realize no matter how amazing someone seems from the outside, we all as human beings experience whenever we do something new, a healthy amount, I'll call it of imposter syndrome. And when I started. My, uh, career as a, as a, as a trainer, uh, ma'am, that imposter syndrome was, uh, pretty prevalent because a part of the process is you're getting thrown out there to present lots of content.
And you do get critiqued. I mean, it's a part of the process. Every student is rating you. You are actually getting rated and everyone has a comment as well. And when you're new at something, uh, not only are, you know, sometimes in new endeavors, you don't have to read a comment list. And a rating list of how you performed.
Um, and in that particular experience for me, that was a part of the process. So it was kind of, sort of this double, double judgment thing going on. Um, and it was so amazing to learn about yourself in it. Back to energy. It's kind of like, uh, how do you interpret Um, other people's feedback, you know, can you, can you view it from the space of opportunity and recognize that people have a right to their opinions and you don't really even have to take someone's opinions personally, even if that opinion is about you, you, you, you can take the pieces of it.
That, that can allow you to learn, but if you are taking it personally, if that's the, the energy or the approach you're giving it, it's going to be very hard to take anything productive from the feedback to then grow. So I would say when I started as a trainer, it was that initial process of just learning how to train.
And then when I met you, just for those who are watching, I met Roger actually in a virtual environment. Um, because I had no idea how to run the behind the scenes of zoom That was a whole new learning curve for me during covid and I gotta say roger That was a whole new learning curve actually for me um learning how to move from being a a solid in person trainer who, um, typically got great ratings and reviews to now suddenly figuring out how to connect in a new way virtually.
And there were some nuances to that, you know, certain jokes that you try to say or certain playfulness that would really work in a room does not necessarily translate virtually at all. In fact, it could come across as offensive, uh, virtually. So I, that was a whole new learning curve for me. Now suddenly I went from great ratings to now these weird comments again.
And, you know, and then the imposter syndrome starts all over again. And it all just correlates back to, I think anytime anyone yet again does something new, you've got to be really open to critique. And you've got to be open to what seems like a judgment. And you have the possibility to view it as an opportunity to develop, or you can take it personally and get upset.
But the world does not have to revolve around you and, you know, cater to making you feel good all the time. That's actually up to you. You're the one who has power and control over that. Not everyone has to tiptoe around you, and people are entitled to their perspectives and their opinions. Um, and, and the sooner we can accept that, I think the, the easier it is to lead from a space of truth, actually, instead of jumping onto bandwagons and losing ourselves in that
[00:17:46] Roger Courville, CSP: as a guy that obviously been doing the virtual thing for a long time.
And if, I mean, I lost track of how many tens of thousands of people have presented to when I was presenting and training all the time. But I would just, I just, oftentimes I was doing that in, in larger environments, right? Webinars with hundreds of people as opposed to a smaller training environment. But I would just kind of apply the, like the Pareto principle.
Okay, let's, let's, let's throw out the top 10 percent because some people are going to love you no matter what. Let's throw out the bottom 10%. Because some people are going to hate you no matter what, and let's one start with kind of where are we at in the middle in terms of, um, and you know, sometimes people just got an axe to grind and you just happen to be writing for that day and, you know, your eyebrows look like uncle Joe and uncle Joe, they don't even know why they don't like you except that uncle Joe's in prison for doing something.
We don't even talk about a family reunions or, or whatever the thing is. And, uh, you know, you don't win them all. But you can learn just out of curiosity, as you were getting your sea legs in presenting virtually, you used the word nuance. What are some of those nuances that you found as you as you kind of got your stride virtually?
[00:19:01] Nina Cashman, PCC: Um, My definitely from my experience, everyone might have a different perspective on this. My sense is you've got to work a little bit harder virtually to make people feel included and connected in the room, so to speak, in the in the virtual space, because You don't have the 10 minute coffee breaks to look someone in the eye and, uh, make them feel connected because you get that one on one conversation as a trainer.
And so I feel like there's more mindfulness involved in how can I inspire someone to want to Be included in this space or to want to engage in this space. And, um, and, and I think that means maybe a little bit more discussion times at times, maybe sometimes asking those who tend to be really vocal. To use their ears a little bit more, while you ask those who tend to not, uh, speak up so much to use their vocal cords a little bit more, and, and being very formal about that request.
Um, also, uh, I found with, with my, um, sense of humor. You know, like sometimes in person it's very easy to razz someone because you can look them in the eye and they see the sincerity that uh that you're that you want the best for them and that you know, you're just having fun and you're having fun because You find that person endearing because you love that person, right?
So you think you can well that can be a little tougher to do I think in the virtual space when you don't know Someone and you're working with someone i'm in colorado. They're in Florida, and that razzing might not land as, as, um, easily because you don't have that added time to connect. So those are a couple of the really obvious things I think that have, that, that need attention and a little bit of adjustment.
And I love that. I love, what did you call that principle, Roger? Because I haven't heard of it before about the top percent, the bottom percent and the middle.
[00:21:04] Roger Courville, CSP: Oh, Pareto, P A R E T O is, is basically it's like the 80 20 rule.
[00:21:10] Nina Cashman, PCC: Okay.
[00:21:11] Roger Courville, CSP: Um, and statistical analysis, sometimes you, you know, just to figure out, sometimes extreme ends of a scale will, you know, skew the numbers.
So if you just take out the middle 80%, you'll get a different view or the middle 95 percent or something. But I just, all right, some people are going to say, Oh, you were great. Because why whatever, and some people are going to say you suck no matter how good you do. So it was just another way of looking at the numbers.
[00:21:39] Nina Cashman, PCC: Yeah. And I think it, it's, it's also about like for our own truth to really getting comfortable with who we are while also being open to the fact that, that there are other people in the room. And so it is, it is important to, um, Make sure that connection stays high. So it's not just about, well, this is who I am and how I'm going to do it.
It's about this is who I am. And there's aspects of me that I'm not going to just try and change to cater to the bottom 10%. Um, I'm going to be myself. Uh, and at the same time, I can be really open to noticing what works for the top 10 percent and also the middle, that middle space. Uh, I think these are interesting questions that you're asking because I haven't really stopped to think too carefully about, about what it's like to be a trainer.
And yet there's a lot of parallels between that and anything in life.
[00:22:40] Roger Courville, CSP: Take yourself back, right? Since you kind of left the corporate world where you spent a whole bunch of time, including You know, corporate marketing, and you've had a whole lot of learning since then. If you went back to your younger self, when you were senior director of marketing at blah, blah, blah, you don't have to name names.
Step into that world and observe it. What, what would you tell that team or that old you to do differently or approach marketing differently?
[00:23:12] Nina Cashman, PCC: Uh, I would say and it's beyond marketing. It's about being a leader and um, it's, it's okay to worry. That's a normal thing. But allow yourself to move through it a little bit more quickly.
Uh, worry is a natural part of life. I wouldn't take that away from someone. Um, it's an important aspect to sometimes even, you know, uh, ring the alarms about certain things that maybe you ought to be a little bit cautious about. There's a possibility to let go of things a little bit faster, and I think that's what I would tell my formal self.
This is actually funny, Roger, because about five years ago, I suddenly had this, like, epiphany that almost turned into a panic. And it was like, oh my gosh, I no longer feel as stressed as some of my clients. Uh, because I've been out of that world. And so maybe that now means that I'm too disconnected to coach them because I can't relate to that amount of pressure and stress that I could relate to them in the beginning when I started coaching, you know, but now I actually feel very relaxed and very calm.
And am I too disconnected to coach this niche that was sort of the epiphany and panic, like, Oh, I don't know what they feel like anymore. I don't understand why they're so stressed. Right? And then it dawned on me. It's like, no, therein lies the beauty. I think of why I'm probably a better more qualified person at this point to work with others because because I'm not worried about my own stress.
Um, I have a lot of space and opening, uh, to invite others to share theirs and we can, we can kind of, uh, see the fuller perspective that can be very hard for you to see by yourself when you're in stress. Um, that's an energy, right? When, when, when we're experiencing the energy of stress, it's very hard for us to see the openings.
It's very hard for us to be creative. It's hard for us to be innovative. And so when you can collaborate with someone. Who is calm and not worried and not anxious, um, it can actually contribute to your sense of calm where you can then tap into your wisdom and, and be much more creative. So I would go back to that, that person, uh, that, that, that young woman I was.
and just say, it's okay to, to experience stress. That's normal. And it really is possible to let go of it quicker. And the quicker you let go of it, the faster the solution is going to come.
[00:25:56] Roger Courville, CSP: I like that. And I'm just, I was just thinking about, as you were even just describing that, I was thinking about, you know, probably naturally my, some of my own experiences and, and what you talked about in a sense of.
Yeah, I would correct me if I don't reflect this back in an accurate way, but it's kind of like returning to that point of centeredness where I'm focused on the things that I can control and not worrying about the things that I can't control, right? Do the best that I can with what I, you know, with what I bring to the table today.
Um, you know, I've had times when someone. Literally, a VP once plucked me out of a team that I was looking at and gave me a new assignment. The good news is, he valued me and thought I could go succeed at the assignment. And I did, but I hated it. And I was making more money than I ever made. And I was just in a place where I wasn't operating out of my Probably core, you know, in the sense of, okay, I'm not wired for this, I might be good at it, but I'm not wired for it.
So it was totally demotivating. I just hated it. And, uh, finally, you know, got a chance to move on. And it was one of those aha moments when it's like, I don't care how much money and make it pays. I don't want this assignment. I need to go home to my wife and kids. Uh, it was a lot of years ago. I need to go home to my wife and kids.
It's something other than a total grumpasaurus. Yeah, and
[00:27:29] Nina Cashman, PCC: what you're describing, that coming back to center, is just, you know, trusting what's true for you, instead of jumping on the bandwagon, and when you trust what's true for you, also recognizing that there's nothing really to worry about. If, if you follow that, it's probably going to, um, work out in ways that contribute to your sense, your center and your sense of calm that is going to make you show up way more wisely than if you continue to, uh, um, stay on this path that someone else thinks is right for you or that others or society even thinks is right for you because of, uh, things like pay.
and so forth. So it's just interesting how it's almost like the more we follow that center, uh, the less we need to worry. And I think it's really normal when you first start trusting your center because sometimes trusting your center, it does involve refuting what, what others think or say about it. And that can cause some, some worry at first.
And when you get really used to, uh, living your life that way. You recognize that as long as I'm sending, as long as I'm following my center, there's really not a whole lot of need to worry.
[00:28:56] Roger Courville, CSP: When an executive comes to you and begins querying about the way that you can help them, are there questions that you wish they would ask that they don't?
[00:29:11] Nina Cashman, PCC: That's such a great question. I have to think about that for a minute. I will say one of the questions, as I think about it, um, one of the questions that comes up a lot In initial conversations is a client will start to go down the path of talking about their personal life and say, Oh, I, I won't.
Sorry. I shouldn't be talking about this because I know this is an executive coaching session. You know, they might talk about how. For instance, their divorce is, is impacting them or some, something happening with their child. Maybe their child is, um, in rehab or, and, and, oh yeah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't talk about that.
There's an apology. Um, and that's something that I don't think a lot of people fully understand is how the whole person impacts the leader. And that's a. Big part of the executive coaching process. We're talking about really the wheel of life and it's all interconnected And so that space has to be very safe to talk about the whole person Not just a part of the person and so a great executive coach Uh, which I'll include myself in the company of and yet there are many of us.
I think any great executive coach is really focused on the person and coaching the person. It really is about personal development and personal development contributes to a strong professional. That is what makes That's the solid leader. That's what makes a decisive person who is capable of making a decision that might, uh, upset the apple cart a little bit.
And yet it is still following the truth of the core of what they know, uh, has to get done. And, and in the business world, as you know, decisions really have to be made. Now back to your question in terms of if, is there a question I wish they would ask? Bye.
[00:31:06] Roger Courville, CSP: Maybe this will maybe framing it up a little differently will will will trigger a thought
[00:31:12] Nina Cashman, PCC: Okay,
[00:31:13] Roger Courville, CSP: and in a way you've already answered the question.
I think here's here's the thing I've been in this for so long and I've trained so many people and I wrote multiple books about presenting virtually and stuff Somebody calls me I already know what questions they're going to ask, and I already know how they ask those questions in a way where they don't really ask the question that helps them get what they want.
Right? Frequently somebody goes, Hey, I need training on zoom or teams or Webex or something like that. They really want to be as a better presenter. So I developed a slow aphorism that just rolls off my tongue. I'm like, if you were thinking about being a writer, would you get there by learning how to use Microsoft word?
And the answer is might be a little useful, but that's not really how you become a great writer. It's not about how to use Microsoft Word. It's about becoming a great writer. So I just anticipate the questions that they're going to ask me and you know, they all, they all fall into certain categories because I've just worked with so many people that I anticipate what they need before they even know how to ask the right question.
I was just curious if there was, is, if there was something that would be helpful to someone listening here because you help them think through getting the right question. And I think a whole bunch of what you've said would already help them with that. So,
[00:32:34] Nina Cashman, PCC: well, and here's also the interesting thing about coaching, which actually a lot of people don't know.
And it's a question that I always ask right up front is, have you been coached before? Because a lot of people, uh. I have this misnomer that a coach is telling you what to do, that a coach is an advice giver. Um, and that's the job of a mentor. And there are a lot of people out there who call themselves coaches and they're not actually coaching.
They're giving templates, they're giving advice. They're not following the coaching modality. The power of coaching is actually we're asking the questions. We're asking the questions of those in front of us to draw the wisdom out of them. And so that's maybe also, you know, an important distinction to make here for everyone to know is, uh, Usually an initial discovery session when I'm working with a prospective client, I'm diving into the questions pretty quickly.
And one of the things that I want to help them discover, similar to your example, Roger, is, Okay, what is it you want out of this partnership? But as we get deeper, the real question is, what do you really, really want? Because usually there's a reason for why you want what you want. And that's what I'm more interested in because that's where the core energy is.
And interestingly, usually what someone really, really wants is a feeling like, uh, I want to be proud of, of myself. I want to, I want to reflect back on this and know I did my best. Well, how would it make you feel if you knew you would do your best? I would feel like I've succeeded. And then the question becomes, well, what are all the other ways that you can feel like you're succeeding right now?
Is it really just this one thing that's going to get you that? Because the truth is, is if you just felt that success and allowed yourself to experience that right now, you probably would get that goal done a lot faster, plus a lot of other things. So that often comes up through my questioning. Um, because again, coaching is a question based modality.
We're not here to tell you what to do because we don't have the best ideas for your life and for your world. A lot of my clients, Roger, are in fields that I've never even worked in, you know, I've worked with engineers, I've worked with scientists. I am far from a scientist. I mean, far from it. I've worked with lawyers.
I've worked with people in the medical field. There's just no way I could contribute as a mentor or even as a consultant productively, uh, in that realm. What I can do, and I'm quite skilled at, is asking powerful questions that draw out wisdom, that are life guiding and profession, profession guiding.
[00:35:24] Roger Courville, CSP: Well, as we, uh, Evolve toward wrap up.
Let me reflect back. One thing that I heard you say that tell me if this quickly summarizes what you just shared there, what do you really want? What do you really, really want? Which was a brilliant little insight, right? It's like, Oh yeah. Cause with backgrounds in marketing, we know that, that. You know, what psychographics are part of, you know, defining and going after a market in terms of, you know, how do we, how do we get someone to take action in the direction of our organization or product or whatever?
But you're right. Why do you want more money? Why do you want the promotion? Why do you want? Want the title, whatever. I don't, I don't want the promotion and what I, I want what I think the promotion is going to give me. Okay. What's that? And that's a, that's a killer point. So
[00:36:18] Nina Cashman, PCC: what that is full circle is energy.
That's, that's the energy that drives the motivation or the fear, the, what you really, really want is usually a feeling. And that feeling is going to drive whatever it is you choose to do. Um, and if, if, if you're, if what you, if what you find is that, um, anxiety is driving your actions, that's why you stay in jobs and roles and on teams that, that fuel that anxiety for you.
If you can really get to the recognition though of what you really, really want, you do start making different decisions. And then those decisions somehow create less anxiety and less worry, even though they're very scary at first. So,
[00:37:02] Roger Courville, CSP: all right. Last question. Next question. How do, how do people get in touch with you?
We've obviously got your website up on the screen. Most people probably just listen. Um, we will put that in the description when we put it up in a blog post. We put, we embed the video in a blog post. We'll also put it on YouTube and then we promo on, on LinkedIn. Besides your website, paveyourway. com. Any other preferred way to connect?
[00:37:25] Nina Cashman, PCC: Yeah. So, uh, by the way, I thank you so much for putting that up. I think my website is one of the best ways that there's a contact form there. Always love hearing from people. And then also on LinkedIn, um, on, I have a Facebook page, uh, for four Pave Your Way, also a Pave Your Way Business page. Um, you can just look me up though, Nina Cashman and, and I'm on Instagram, on Facebook and um, LinkedIn probably the most active, I would say on LinkedIn.
And as my kids like to make fun of me on Facebook because they think that is very old person . But I'm like, well, that's. That's where my crew's hanging out. So
[00:38:02] Roger Courville, CSP: I am a lot more of an old person now than, I don't know, 15 years ago or whenever I started on Facebook. Yes. But yeah. All right. What questions should I have asked you today that I haven't asked you?
[00:38:15] Nina Cashman, PCC: Gosh, what a great question. Well, you know, one of the things I do want everyone to know is one of the interesting things that can happen when someone explores their truth in the executive coaching space is a contemplation of What am I doing? With my life. Right? The more familiar you, the more you wake up with a truth of who you are and what you value and what's important to you and what you really, really want, the more you start questioning, how am I spending my time?
And because of that, I created an online program called the PAVE Challenge, which helps people get clear. About their career and life transition because a lot of people start going moving through a transition in life and career as they wake up to a lot of their values and and truths and I found that there's a lot of Um, telling people what to do out there, uh, when they're transitioning, like, okay, here's how you put a resume together.
Here's how you, let's polish your interviewing skills. And not a whole lot of time has been spent on valuing the contemplative space. That really is useful in leveraging before you polish your resume and start interviewing. Um, taking some time to actually pause and really reevaluate where you've been and what lessons you can extract.
And really reconnecting to what you really, really want. Before you jump into that same insanity once again. And that's what the Pave Challenge was designed to do. So that's one other way that you can, uh, that you can connect with me. We, I have a master class that you can check out. You just go to paveyourway.
com and there's a space there where you can register for that master class if that's of interest to you.
[00:40:11] Roger Courville, CSP: Nina, thank you so much for all the little wisdom nuggets along the way and spending a little time with us today. Um, I can't tell you how, how enjoyable this has been and I would imagine we could go on for hours and hours, but we won't.
So again, Nina Cashman, paveyourway. com and I certainly want to thank, um, thank her on behalf of, of, uh, You listening in the audience and our sponsor, virtual venues who, uh, who made all of this possible. We'll catch you on the next episode of thought leader conversations.
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